Break-Up Advice

Surviving after a break-up is tough. Speaking about relationships, relationships connect us in this world with each other. We have many kinds of relationships-parental, sibling, friends, professional and love. We go through many phases in all these relationships. Ups and downs are part of our life and our relationships. Most of us can bear break down in most of the above relationships except those of love. Why? Who will survive a breakdown in romantic relationship and how? Let us find out.

I was speaking to somebody who will be breaking up soon. The statement went something like this- I did everything possible to save our relationship. I gave in a lot, but I could not save. We will be breaking-up soon. That has already broken my heart. This relationship was made brick by brick over so many years. What all we did not do to make it last? But alas, we are breaking up. I asked the person- how to you propose to go on in life now? There was no answer except a blank stare. This happens to most of us.

The immediate effect of the break-up is pain. The pain goes away slowly over a number of years, but the initial impact is high. It is the initial period during which one has to gather all the energy and tolerate the pain.

The second effect is bitterness and blame. There is recap of all the arguments and fights and there is a large amount of self-talk about how one were ditched. That is not pleasant. Try the following to overcome this phase.

Spend quality time with friends, involving you in new activities, and keep yourself busy.

Refocus yourself to your career. Make some very exciting plans and meet some intelligent and successful people. Begin talking to them about what you should do to enhance your potential. Find out what can be done best by you and how will you reach the top. Write down all these goals and focus on them.